May 16 2014

Potty Training Coffey Style…

Published by at 4:21 pm under News

Isn’t it a gas thing all the same when you see something that’s kind of ordinary and it makes you laugh, take this orange box for instance. There I was strolling along minding my own business when I spotted it on the ground. You see, when my brother Joe was a little fella of about 2 years old he couldn’t reach up over our po in the toilet to have a pee and he’d end up peeing all over the place. The Ma’ said that he’d have to have one of us with him every time to lift him up when he wanted to go. So the Da’ put on his thinking cap. The following evening he arrived home from work with a tomato box on the back carrier of his bike. We all thought he’d brought home more little yellow chickens but the box was empty. And of course being the Da’ he said nothing about what it was for and sat down to his dinner with a grin on his face.
The next thing is he’s off out to his shed with the box under his arm and he whistling away like a stuffed canary. After about an hour he resurfaced holding the box as if it was a World Cup Trophy or something and grinning from ear to ear. Now the Da’ was a collector of all sorts of things from bent nails to rusty screws and anything he’d pick up on his travels. He threw away nothing in case it came in handy. Anyway in he comes into the kitchen and places the box on the table. ‘Now…’ he says ‘…problem sorted’. He had nailed a piece of old lino on the box. He picks Joe up in his arms and off up the stairs he heads with the whole gang of us in hot pursuit. He places the box on the floor next to the po and stands Joe on it. Joe looks up at the Da’ and grinning starts to do his business with a great surge of pee making a direct hit into the bowl. The next thing is the Da’ let’s out a great big cheer.
Some weeks later the Da’ had to attend a meeting to do with the Church Collection. Home he comes a little worse for wear because I think the meeting had to adjourn to the Oasis pub for a while. He was in great form as we all headed off to bed. Later in the early hours of the morning the Da’ has to get rid of some of the liquid from the Oasis. Out he heads to the toilet and the next thing is we’re all woken up with him cursing and screaming all over the house. In the dark he’d forgotten all about his new invention and tripped over it. He put his two hands out to stop his fall and one of them went straight down the toilet bowl and he ended up with a broken arm. Into the Mater Hospital he went and had us all sworn to secrecy about where his arm ended up. Later on of course and down through the years we had a great laugh about it all. So there you have it, my little story about the tomato box I saw the other day…

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